facebook - Hotel California

Yes, you can check out anytime you like, but you can never leave.

Meanwhile on the dark desert highway, cool wind in your hair, there is a traffic jam.

"Last thing I remember, I was
Running for the door
I had to find the passage back
To the place I was before"

(acknowledgement to the Eagles)

Did they write it for those trying to escape from facebook?

This congestion is because certain folk have seen sense and pleaded "Help, get me out of here!"

Anyway, the facetious balloon has reached bursting point.

This balloon, awash with hot air could explode spreading millions of tons of garbage over the earth.

Imagine every word and phrase, every poorly written sentence, every noun, adjective and conjunction, every paragraph of crap, every expletive, every misspelt word, every inane thought and ignorant expression suddenly hitting the atmosphere?

The deluge could wipe out mankind.

Future survivors would examine the remnants, like archaeologists minutely trying to put the pieces together.

The fossilised remains of past facebook lives would be examined like ammonites and scrutinised by palaeontologists. Here they would store them in archives, attempting to garner the strange names like erecticus beckamus, or gigabite gaga, councilhousus colininitus and towerhamleticus tracy.

Slowly over decades they would learn that these folk had a network of thousands. They would discover that everyone was famous because they each had over 500,000 friends.

They would learn that everyone knew everyone else, that life was meaningless without them, and yet they never ever met.

They would learn that two gods ruled the Earth in perpetual conflict. The omnipotent Apple and the almighty Microsoft, around whom all life revolved. Fruit would be named in their honour spawning devices like blackberries, strawberries and lots of gooseberries.

They would discover that the gods eventually united to create AppleSoft.

Unfortunately the union was rotten to the core.

As life evolved after the big bang, other species developed which were of particular interest to scientists.

Small nano-bugs with 140 characters appeared everywhere.

There were mega-trillions of them which twittered at night, like loud cicadas. Although harmless, they were very irritating.

The Great Twitter Cull of 2110 AD resulted in mass extermination, but it had to be done.

And then there was silence.

The Earth could hear again. People interacted in person. They shook hands, kissed, nodded, shared food, and danced and embraced together.

AppleSoft was dead. facebook was a fossil, and the last surviving tweets echoed in the ether.

Someone found an old tattered book. It was difficult to read but it said "In the beginning was the word......"